i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Just invented taco cereal.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm both gender and math confused
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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