even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
We have so much sex to catch up on
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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