oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
