why didn't you poke me back
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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