Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
