Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
