definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
