People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
