i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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