and i looked up. we had an audience...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
