theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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