I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize