My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
