Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
