the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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