glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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