would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
home. puking in laundry basket.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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