I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
