Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
