Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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