Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize