belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
