I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
