that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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