Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
