maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
