stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
