Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
