I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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