Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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