Ambien. No doubt about it.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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