I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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