Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize
