farters have to be the big spoon...
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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