ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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