The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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