people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
