if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Never let your siblings swipe right.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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