So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
