I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
