There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Randomize
