3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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