Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
