Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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