It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Im part way to drunk.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
