why didn't you poke me back
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
