In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
