So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
