They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
