We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize