Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
