don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
